Decoding Attachment Styles

In this episode, I’m joined by attachment coaches Marta and Duncan for an open conversation about breakups, attachment, and why knowing you should move on doesn’t necessarily make it easier to do.
We talk about what keeps us emotionally attached, why some breakups are harder to recover from than others, and what may actually be happening underneath the urge to hold on, reach out, or hope they’ll come back.
This isn’t an interview. It’s three attachment coaches having an honest conversation about the psychology of letting go and what it takes to finally begin moving forward.
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We spend a lot of time asking why our partners behave the way they do.
But how often do we ask ourselves what our own childhood taught us about being an adult?
In this episode, we explore how the lessons we learned growing up shape our relationships today - from anxious and avoidant patterns to what secure attachment actually looks like in everyday life.
We'll talk about responsibility, boundaries, compassion, and why understanding someone's past doesn't mean you have to build your future around it.
If you've ever wondered why the same relationship patterns keep showing up, this conversation is for you.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.
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It is frustrating when a partner can't give you what you need especially after they promised or implied they could. 
We try to change them - or their mind. 
We hope they can change and become the person we thought they were when we first met. 
We struggle with the fear of the relationship ending, lashing out with hurtful words, doing things that causes more damage - and then regretting them all when we are calm. 
This episodes walks you through what you can do before the damage is done. 
Breathing tips as promised in this episode -
Practice 5 minutes a day and build from there
Focus on your breathing and learn its natural rhythm before you do anything. 
Intentionally breathe deeply - in and out. 
Ask your doctor about box breathing exercises and if it's right for you. This is great for calming the nervous system and helping us respond with clear intentions instead of reacting.
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Are the manipulating you by telling you what you want to hear? It's a lot deeper than this and this episode breaks it down. 

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Today I'm answering three questions I get asked constantly. And I picked these three on purpose, because they build on each other. The first one is the controversial one: can a fearful-avoidant actually have a successful relationship WITHOUT going to therapy? People want me to say no. I'm not going to say no. But I'm also not going to give you the comfortable answer.
The second question is one almost everyone struggles with: how do I know if what I'm feeling is anxiety, or if it's a real need I should actually honor? Because those two things feel identical in your body, and most of the internet can't tell you the difference.
And the third one is personal, and a lot of you have felt it: "I feel abandoned every single time my partner goes off to a team dinner or out with friends. How do I get over this?" We're going to take that one apart together, because the real answer isn't what you think it is.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.
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