Thumb War

Spoilers ahead for Masters of the Universe.

Jason and Rachel review Masters of the Universe, the new He-Man movie from Amazon MGM and Mattel.

Rachel grew up on He-Man, She-Ra, and the whole Masters of the Universe toy-cartoon universe. Jason mostly remembers it as the moment he realized cartoons could just be commercials for toys. So naturally, expectations were complicated.

We get into why the new Masters of the Universe feels like it can’t decide what kind of movie it wants to be, whether He-Man works as modern IP, the strange tone, the comedy that doesn’t always land, the nostalgia callbacks, the “He-Man” name problem, the 1987 Dolph Lundgren version, the She-Ra tease, and why Skeletor is easily the best thing in the movie.

Plus: Jared Leto, Alison Brie, Idris Elba, Battle Cat asking for consent, Ram Man, Fisto, Brian May guitars, toy-commercial cynicism, masculine legacy confusion, and whether hardcore Masters of the Universe fans will have a better time than we did.

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Spoilers for Scary Movie.

Jason and Rachel review Scary Movie, the sixth installment in the franchise and the return of the Wayans Brothers.

The movie brings back Anna Faris, Regina Hall, Ghostface, horror spoof chaos, offensive jokes, stoner comedy, and a whole lot of nostalgia — but did it actually make us laugh?

We talk about the Wayans Brothers returning to the franchise, the Teyana Taylor cold open, the packed-but-quiet theater experience, Scary Movie 3 holding up surprisingly well, The Naked Gun comparison, whether the jokes pull their punches, and why this reboot left us more sad than satisfied.

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Jason and Rachel review The Ugly Stepsister, a Norwegian body horror take on Cinderella now streaming on Hulu.

Told from the perspective of Elvira, the eldest stepsister, the movie turns the familiar fairy tale into a grotesque nightmare about beauty standards, class, desperation, and what women are forced to do to survive in a world built around male approval.

We talk body horror, Brothers Grimm fairy tales, the tapeworm scene, eyelash sewing, foot mutilation, sound design, feminist horror, and why this worked for us way more than The Substance.

Spoilers for The Ugly Stepsister.
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Jason and Rachel review Obsession, the breakout horror hit from writer-director Curry Barker.

The movie follows Bear, a hopeless romantic who uses the mysterious “One Wish Willow” to make his crush love him — only to discover that getting exactly what you want can be an absolute nightmare.

We talk about the movie’s huge word-of-mouth success, its TIFF Midnight Madness buzz, Curry Barker’s horror-comedy style, Andy Richter, toxic longing, magical consent nightmares, and why Jason is already calling this one of the best movies of the year.

Spoilers for Obsession.
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Jason and Rachel enter the Backrooms for a spoiler-filled review of A24’s new horror movie from Kane Parsons, the creator behind the viral Kane Pixels YouTube series.

We talk creepypasta, no-clipping, liminal spaces, yellow wallpaper, internet horror, YouTube filmmakers breaking into Hollywood, and whether Backrooms works as a full-length movie or should have stayed a terrifying online mystery. Is it scary? Is it frustrating? Is it the next evolution of horror? We get lost in all of it.

Spoilers for Backrooms.
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