So Your Parents Are Old

Senior care advisor Neil Nagraj and podcaster Laura House join Vanessa to talk about the impossible math of senior housing: when aging in place stops working, what assisted living actually is, and why so many families wait for a crisis before making a plan. Also discussed: memory care, Medicaid myths, long-term care insurance, and Gen X’s grim future.

Learn more about Neil’s company, The Senior Housing Authority. For more from Laura, listen to How’s Your Boomer? or subscribe to the newsletter.

This is an episode where we get mad! Comedian ⁠Lewis Black⁠ cared for his late elderly parents, who lived to 101 and 104. He talks about something nobody wants to even think about: what he'll do when he's too old to care for himself.

Hear more from Lewis in his podcast, ⁠Lewis Black's Rantcast⁠, or read one of his ⁠books⁠.

When a loved one is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, the grieving starts years before the end. In The End Is the Beginning, Jill Bialosky tells her mother’s story in reverse. Jill and Vanessa talk about what it means to “eulogize” someone while they’re disappearing, and how writing can be both tribute and survival. You can read Jill’s New York Times essay on losing her mother during the pandemic.

To connect with the team, find us on ⁠Instagram⁠ and ⁠Youtube⁠, or shoot us an email at soyourparentsareold@gmail.com. We want to hear from you! 

Lily Houston Smith is our senior producer; music by Mark McAdam and Amber Devereux.

Elder care and childcare costs are rising fast, while wages and support for caregivers lag behind. Longtime care policy advocate Julie Kashen breaks down how we got here, what it would look like if we treated care as real infrastructure, and offers a surprisingly hopeful framework for what’s still possible.

Learn more about Julie's work at The Century Foundation.

Kim Elliott’s caregiving story includes a leukemia diagnosis, a stem cell transplant, and some truly deranged insurance battles. She talks with Vanessa about surviving all of it — and building Gray Monster so other caregivers don’t have to start from scratch.